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I AM NOT WORTHY!

So, I have figured out that I am not worthy.

My congregation (Holy Cross) has adopted one of the family's from New Orleans that was brought to New Mexico. So today, we took a bunch of stuff over to their apartment, and I must say that "I am not worthy". I do not know how to even feel about all of this. They were so humble, and after hearing Kelly tell their story this morning in Sunday School, I am amazed. I know I would have wimped out or something, and would be dead, but I do not think I could have done what they did.



For you who do not know, the family we adopted is a Mother & Father and their 4 boys (14, 11, 3 year, 6 weeks). They rode out the Hurricane Katrina, in there home. They made it thru find and all, and decided to take a nap around 2pm one day. When they went to sleep, everything was dry and ok. When then woke up 2 hours later, the water was upto the front steps on their house. So, they had already gathered important docs and such, and they were in baggies. So, they decided they could still spend the night there so they could get a good nights rest, then they were going to take off in the morning.

So, they walked all day thru water that at some points came up to the neck on the mother, to the superdome. All of this with a 4 week old baby. So, when they got tot the superdome, the smell was just unreal. Nothing worked, no restroom, no water, no A/C. So, finally they got evacuated after a couple of days there. When they were being evacuated, they had to wait in line for 48 hours. During the evacuation, they got separated. The mother and kids wound up in Austin, and the father somewhere in OK.

So, finally they got connected and came here. Lucky they do have some extended family here in Albuquerque, which is a good thing, but they still have only limited resources. Just hearing that story, and all that they have survived, almost brings me to tears. That one family can go thru all of this, and still come out alive, and united. That to me is amazing.



So, I feel as if I do not have room to bitch about things like my car, and if my computer is acting up, or if I have a bad day at work, cus I have all of that shit and even more. Not only do I have a nice laptop computer, high speed internet, 2 TV's, a VCR, Dish Network, a DVD player, and a sound system, but I have a car that works, I have a job, I have money in my savings account. I just feel with all this crap that I am not worthy.

Some times I need a good slap in the face, to bring me back to reality, and that life is not about all the crap I just said I have above, but it’s about people, living, life, family, friends, and helping people. So, I looked around my apartment, thought of what I got at work & anything I still have at my parents house, and figured out what I was going to give them. I then remembered that I had just gotten a new flat panel monitor for my birthday, so I had my old 17" monitor in my closet and that I had one of my old computers just sitting under my desk not being used. So, I grabbed the monitor, computer, keyboard, mouse, and such, and set it up on my dining room table last night. Then I formatted it, got everything reinstalled, found some old games and such that I do not use, got them loaded up. So, after I got everything done, I took it up to church this morning so I could give it to them.

They were so happy to have a computer. You know, to me it was my old 500mhz Compaq with a 10gb hard drive. To them it’s something they thought they would never have. For me, it's something I had laying around, and not being used. To them, it’s something that they boys can write papers on, play games, and such. I guess the old saying is true that some people’s trash is other people’s treasure.

So, I do not know right now how I should feel. I know there is an overwhelming feeling I have, but I can not describe it right now. Anyway, if you are in the Albuquerque area and feel you have stuff that we might be able to use, call my cell (if you know it) or leave me a comment, and I will respond. Right now, I know that we are looking for a love seat, an entertainment unit, and lamps / lights for bed rooms. We have some other things we are getting them, but I think we have that under control.

If you are outside of the Albuquerque area, and still want to help, we are accepting donations. Make a check out to "Holy Cross Lutheran Church", and put in the memo line, "Wilson Family". If you want a tax-donation form, also include your name, address, and amount you gave on a piece of paper. Mail this to:

Holy Cross Lutheran Church
6901 Wyoming Blvd NE
Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87109

So, that is all I have to say for now. If you can help, please do. If you do not give to Holy Cross, then give to the Red Cross, or another origination out there. Thank you!



With God's Everlasting Love and Grace,
Kevin

Comments

( 4 People Thought — Tell Me What You Think )
trinity_kate
Sep. 18th, 2005 06:10 pm (UTC)
I hear you...
I hear you little brother! It's a lot like what I experienced this summer at the hospital but slightly different. There were times when I thought, "Wow, I'm healthy and I get to go home tonight. I don't have to stay here... I am so lucky right now. But it could be me..." I think that people don't like thinking about all that, whether it be dying at the hospital or struggling through sewage and such in New Orleans, because that forces them to say, "That could be me..." We don't want it to be us. It also forces us to look at what is really important and I think you're on the right track. =) I now think of every day I'm alive as a gift. I don't take time I have for granted anymore. I also don't expect that I will live to a ripe old age anymore, I rejoice when I'm healthy even for one more day. I think it's so much about perspective. Let me know what happens. =)
(Anonymous)
Sep. 18th, 2005 08:44 pm (UTC)
Worthy
Your post reminds me of the time Phil, Barb and Alex were in the earthquake. I tried for days to get through to them on the phone. One day I finally got ringing instead of busy circuits. Barb got on the phone, and I could hear the huge, gigantic smile in her voice as she said "Oh, all the bricks in the fireplace fell down, and I think everything in the house that could break is broken, but we're all fine - just fine!". The whole time I could actually hear her smiling and sounding ecstatic while she said this. They had learned the truly important lesson - the rest of that is just stuff, and stuff can be replaced - they had what was truly important. Love you, Bud.
Mom
(Anonymous)
Sep. 21st, 2005 08:50 pm (UTC)
thats how i felt when helping construct the shelter in dallas.

its hard for these situatons, and i think that God picks special people who he knows can be strong, believe in Him, and endure the situatino in order to teach the rest of us a lesson. kind of like the great flood in hte bible you know?

and for the reccord, i dont think you're selfish or anything. i know that you realize and are thankful for all you have. i have seen you take numerous trips to Juarez to construct houses, etc. you have a good heart and are probably a lot more enlightened than most people around our age group.

<3 Jo
claystorm
Sep. 21st, 2005 09:14 pm (UTC)
I wrote that post going, you know, I think I know how Jo felt when she was in Texas.

I also, I have first had experance that god pics strong people and I know that, but that does not make it any easyer to deal with.

Anyway, thank you for your comment. I hope all is well on your end.

Peace,
Kevin
( 4 People Thought — Tell Me What You Think )

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